Every Sunday my family gets together for Sunday dinner (not sure why we call it dinner, it’s really after church lunch). So, for Mother’s Day my cousins and I always cook for the mothers. Generally, I’m in charge of desserts so throughout the week I was prepping (in my head) what I would bake. My family is simple so a pound cake would suffice but I like to mix it up every now and again since my mother loves chocolate and we now have a vegan in the family. To ensure everyone was accounted for I decided to bake a coconut cream pound cake, vegan chocolate cake from scratch and a pan of peach cobbler. I made a Krogers run and started prepping Saturday night about 11pm. I had all my ingredients and I just knew these desserts were about to smash! Because I’ve never made vegan desserts before I decided to start with that first. Around 2am I was whipping up the ingredients in my mixer when my mixer started blowing smoke. I coughed, turned it off and unplugged it immediately. Now, this mixer is the very first mixer my mother gave me when I started baking over 15 years ago so it has some sentimental value behind it. I hadn’t used my mixer in a while so maybe the dust particles needed to be blown off, I let it cool off and started mixing by hand. After a few minutes I plugged it back in, turned it on and waited.. nothing. I put it back in the box and tossed it in the trash. Because I wanted to ensure my cake was moist, I wasn’t confident mixing without a mixer. My neighbors weren’t home and I didn’t want to text anyone with it being so late so I started mixing by hand and changed the recipe to vegan cookies. Once I finished the cookies, I cleaned up the kitchen and called it a night. Side note- Vegan butter is not cheap!
After a few hours of sleeping, I woke up and started preparing my peach cobbler. I took a stab at baking a peach cobbler several years ago and when it tasted NOTHING like Big Mama’s, I let it rest. I decided to give it another try and it turned out really good. The family loved it! I 86’d the pound cake because I didn’t have a mixer and didn’t have time to go buy one, bake it and be at church with my momz by the time it started so I found a Mexican bakery that did homemade cakes. The cake was all chocolate with a coffee taste inside- Momz is a coffee drinker so that was perfect.
I was late getting to church but I made it just in time to enjoy the rest of the service with momz and see her smile. It was nice. Mother’s Day turned out to be better than I expected. Although our relationship is not where I’d like it to be, I’m going to keep trying because in reality, she won’t be here forever so I have to put pride aside and cherish those moments while I have the chance. We had a great time with family, all the mother’s enjoyed themselves and it was simply a beautiful day.
Happy Mother’s Day to all! -Corrita
Mother’s Day is not a favorite “holiday” of mine. Never has been. I was blessed to be adopted as a baby and had a life well-provided for but my relationships with my mothers (adoptive and bio) have not been the best. If you truly know me and we’ve had conversations on a deeper level, it’s no secret. It’s an area in my life that has always been strained, strange to discuss and hard to overcome from a pre-teen to now. I’m surrounded by sooo many women: sisters, Aunts, my Grandmother, God-Mother, co-workers and friends whom I look up to but it’s absolutely nothing like having a mother/daughter relationship. Yearned for but never had.
With the help of a friend, a few months ago I got into therapy to address those dark areas in my life. As I did my homework things started looking up. In the AA community, therapy isn’t always a go-to solution. For years I’ve always heard “just pray about it”. I do and I have prayed but sometimes a fix is needed on a deeper level. At first I was a bit ashamed about it but when I sat and thought, you shouldn’t be ashamed of something that will help you grow. I too want to be a therapist at some point and I need to understand from the client’s perspective what it’s like sitting on the other side of the couch spilling your words on sensitive subjects.
I was invited and asked to do a poem at a Mother’s Day breakfast last week. As I was writing and gathering my thoughts I didn’t only want to talk about the beautiful things or happy times of Mother’s Day because that’s not everyone’s experience. A lot of women find that day hard for a number of reasons, including myself. By the end, it was not only therapeutic for me but helpful for other women as well. Saying that to say, never Judge a person’s story if the day isn’t all about happy feelings, flowers and champagne. You never know another’s person’s walk. Today has not been a good day, at all. I’ve been in the house and to myself but I have to do some baking and will find the strength to attend church with my mother tomorrow so tomorrow will be a better day. –Corrita 💛